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'Wedding Speeches For Women' by Suzan St Maur

A reassuring book to have at hand, whether your own speech-giving duties will be as the bride, the mother or a friend. With years of experience of writing speeches and coaching people on how to deliver them, Suzan St Maur makes you feel you're in safe hands.

I'd say most of the information and advice given would be equally applicable to male speech-givers, but the author does make some of her own distinctions about how a woman's wedding speech might differ from a man's. On the subject of jokes, for example, she says: 'Maybe I'm a bit of a romantic and all that, but I think women can make jokes that are a cut above the run-of-the-mill sarcastic, wee-wee-taking gags you'll find in the majority of wedding-speech books...' She goes on to give some examples and how they might be adapted to your needs.

As you can tell from the above quote, the style of writing is refreshingly informal and chatty. Don't relax too much, though ' the author insists that the success of your speech depends on plenty of preparation and NO ALCOHOL on the big day (until after your duties are over, of course).

The book is divided into three sections:

1. It's Easy When You Know How ' covering subjects like preparation, rehearsal and delivery
2. Developing Your Content ' includes specially targeted chapters according to whether you're the bride, the bride's mother, the bride's daughter or a maid of honour.
3. Content Resources ' sample jokes, poems and quotations, plus ideas for where to find others.

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When Sarah offered up this book for reviewing, I had already long decided that I was going to make a speech. I had had a number of ideas floating about my head, but hadn't yet sat down to put anything concrete together. With less than a month to go, and a million and one other things to do, it was time to get cracking.

I reckon there are two types of women who might use this book; those who are naturally inclined public speakers, and those in a situation where they are taking a traditional male role, due to personal circumstances. I fell firmly in the former category, but both these groups will benefit from this book. Those in the latter category, who are willing, but possibly a bit nervous, will find the earlier section especially useful.

The book is divided into two main sections: the first deals with the basics; how to structure, how to deliver a speech, the mechanics of writing, how to deal with nerves and so on. In addition, Suzan St Maur recognises the particular challenges in her audience that face women speakers (non-traditional, can't be seen to be doing jokes, etc' but gives strategies to deal with them.

The second part of the book is designed to help you flesh out your speech and there is a chapter dedicated to each type of female role there may be. I obviously used the chapter on the Bride making a speech, but there are chapters for if you are taking the role of best man or father of the bride, or if you are the bridesmaid, mother, or daughter of the bridal couple.

As a fairly comfortable public speaker, this second section was the most useful for me, giving ideas about structure, content, how to avoid overshadowing my groom, not pre-empting the best man and so on. There is a third part to this book, which gives loads of ideas for content; jokes, quotes, poems, and there is even a section on writing your own poetry. Finally, there is a reference section for further ideas, in book form and on the web.

This book would be particularly suitable for those women who haven't done much public speaking before, but equally, there is much to benefit those who are more used to standing up in front of people. I may have done it many times before, but never on my wedding day in front of all my friends and family!

I thoroughly enjoyed speaking at my own wedding, and got lots and lots of compliments, mainly about how unusual and refreshing it was. My personal tips; use the structure she suggests, and the method for outlining and fleshing out the speech, use little notecards with key words for reminders, don't make jokes if you can't deliver them well, and keep it short and sweet. But above all, remember, it's your day and everyone will be on your side. Enjoy!

It has a chapter on if you are the daughter of the bride or groom, so would help you out if you are making a speech.