For the mums..... (watch topic)
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RheaDesigns
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Posting Time: 17 Nov 2008 at 11:12AM  Reply with quote   Edit this post   Delete this post

Having children (The older the mother, the funnier this is!)

Being pregnant:

1st baby: You begin wearing maternity clothes as soon as your gynacologist confirms your pregnancy.
2nd baby: You wear your regular clothes for as long as possible.
3rd baby: Your maternity clothes ARE your regular clothes.

Preparing for the Birth:

1st baby: You practice your breathing religiously.
2nd baby: You don't bother because you remember that last time, breathing didn't do a thing.
3rd baby: You ask for an epidural in your eighth month.


The Layette:

1st baby: You pre-wash newborn's clothes, color-coordinate them, and fold them neatly in the baby's little bureau.
2nd baby: You check to make sure that the clothes are clean and discard only the ones with the darkest stains.
3rd baby: Boys can wear pink, can't they?

Worries:

1st baby: At the first sign of distress--a whimper, a frown--you pick up the baby
2nd baby: You pick the baby up when her wails threaten to wake your first born.
3rd baby: You teach your three-year-old how to rewind the mechanical swing.

Dummies/Pacifiers:

1st baby: If the pacifier falls on the floor, you put it away until you can go home and wash and boil it.
2nd baby: When the pacifier falls on the floor, you squirt it off with some juice from the baby's bottle.
3rd baby: You wipe it off on your shirt and pop it back in.

Activities

1st baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics, Baby Swing, Baby Zoo, Baby Movies and Baby Story Hour.
2nd baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics.
3rd baby: You take your infant to the supermarket and the school gates to collect 1st and 2nd babies.

Going Out:

1st baby: The first time you leave your baby with a sitter, you call home five times.
2nd baby: Just before you walk out the door, you remember to leave a number where you can be reached.
3rd baby: You leave instructions for the sitter to call only if she sees blood.

At Home:

1st baby: You spend a good bit of every day just gazing at the baby.
2nd baby: You spend a bit of everyday watching to be sure your older child isn't squeezing, poking, or hitting the baby.
3rd baby: You spend a little bit of every day hiding from the children

Swallowing Coins:

1st child: When first child swallows a coin, you rush the child to the hospital and demand x-rays
2nd child: When second child swallows a coin, you carefully watch for the coin to pass.
3rd child: When third child swallows a coin you deduct it from his allowance!

And always remember that grandchildren are God's reward for allowing your children to live!
[www.rheadesigns.co.uk]
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lauraanddave
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Posting Time: 17 Nov 2008 at 11:29AM  Reply with quote   Edit this post   Delete this post

Thats so funny Hahaha Hahaha
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Claire061007
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Posting Time: 17 Nov 2008 at 12:57PM  Reply with quote   Edit this post   Delete this post

I like that, its very funny and so true.

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bigfatlondonwedding
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Posting Time: 17 Nov 2008 at 8:47PM  Reply with quote   Edit this post   Delete this post

They are very funny.
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kirkychic
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Posting Time: 18 Nov 2008 at 1:14AM  Reply with quote   Edit this post   Delete this post

Ah so true Hahaha Hahaha Hahaha Hahaha expecially the bit about the clothes Hahaha Hahaha
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Orla
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Posting Time: 18 Nov 2008 at 8:41PM  Reply with quote   Edit this post   Delete this post

My mother thought this was hilarious - she had 5 kids, I got to be the mollycoddled numero uno!

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MrsKirkham
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Posting Time: 19 Nov 2008 at 7:06PM  Reply with quote   Edit this post   Delete this post

That is so funny. My mum will love that. And being the oldest, I guess I got all the attention Bielzebub
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